Monday, February 10, 2014

Goal setting for the year...

Yes, I know it's February but I started this post in January and have since had time to reflect on it.  In the past I have made lists of goals and this year is no different.  One year I think I chose one word to focus on...like a theme for the year.  This year I am doing 'D' - all of the above.  I chose 2 words for the year.  One I'd like to focus on passively and the other actively.


This might surprise some people, but I am not exactly an optimist.  I tend to get anxious over things to come, to over-think all the pitfalls or ways things could go haywire.  When I do that, I forget to acknowledge God and His Promises.  There are a couple of big things coming up in 2014, some I am sure of and some that may not happen.  I am choosing to focus on the word PROMISE for various reasons - to remember God's Promises, to remind myself of hope and faith, to honor the promises I have made to others and myself and basically to flip my thinking.  I have been so blessed by God - He has kept and continues to keep many of His promises.  In my head over the past couple of days, I had much more to say about this one but I'm realizing that I'm not in a place to share it all.  But please trust me when I say that this word is needed.  This word is one I'm clinging to this year.  



In regard to the action word, I chose GIVE.  Part of me was thinking of people I know who are so very giving of their time, money, talent and themselves!  Many times I wish I was like them.  Then there are times I feel like I already do a lot of giving and it's exhausting!  Sometimes I think of my Lord and Savior on the cross and all that He has given to me and I can barely fathom it.  Many people will say things like "I don't know how you do it!" or "I could never do what you do!" when they find out we foster and have adopted.  (My response to their comments is a whole 'nother blog post, but that's not the point right now.)  There are few people who's opinions and feelings on the matter that count when it comes to decisions about whether or not we are going to continue or try again.  When it comes to the kids, obviously there are times when they get jealous or feel left out.  (Side note - go read the book 'How Are You Peeling'!  Everyone of our kids - bio, foster, adopted, babysitting, friends' kids, etc has LOVED this book!)  We talk to our kids about their feelings a lot.  It's ok to have feelings, it's ok to express them, it's NOT ok to be disrespectful and out of control when expressing them, etc...We always say that we love b/c He first loved us.  We receive so much love, grace, mercy, compassion, etc that tons of extra comes pouring out of our hearts and there's plenty of it to go around.  The fact that the kids tell other people that in their own words is...special.  Now, when I say GIVE here, I don't just mean money.  Like I said before, for me, I'm going to focus this year on how I can give support, encouragement, physical stuff, money, my time - all of it.  Not to the point of being empty, mind you, I still need to take care of myself.  But truly I/we have been so blessed and it's time we actively bless others.  Another reason I chose this word is for the last definition.  As I said earlier, I am not the most 'chill' person out there.  My brain cooks up these ideas of what the future could look like and then when reality doesn't match, I feel overwhelmed and stressed and I just hang on to those thoughts of what could have been...so this last definition was for me.  GIVE - as in be flexible.  Life for me so far has thrown a lot of curve balls, some I handled better than others.  Admittedly I am still 'handling' or processing some of those curveballs b/c I didn't want to deal w/them at the time.  But I can see that now and I can see that I didn't 'GIVE', I wasn't willing to be shaped or molded by those events.  So I have learned something, even at my age, about how to go forward.  Whether I wanted to or not, many curveballs have already changed who I am and what I do when thrown the ball.
Like I said, I have chosen some words to focus on but also written out some goals.  Not much has changed from last year - w/4 kids in the house at the beginning of the year, it was a struggle to move forward on some things.  Then when they left, it was a different kind of struggle.  Some of you know what I'm talking about!  It's ok if you don't, in fact, I pray you don't ever have to struggle like that.  Even though many or my goals remain the same, I'm still writing them as goals for this year.


2014 goals
Spiritual
-I will be joining Inspired To Action's Maximizing Your Mornings Challenge once again! (REPEAT)
-I'm hoping to do more scripture memorizing w/the whole family.  Out of all the verses I had memorized w/Moses, a little over half have 'stuck' in my gray matter.  I can do better.  (REPEAT)
-I am serving as a part of the women's ministry at church.  I hope to be a part of a small group soon!  
-(NEW) I've been reading a lot more about accountability partners or mentors or just having a person in your life to talk to about spiritual matters...it's been a long time since I've consistently had someone like this in my life and I would like to change that.  Not sure where to start, but just by writing it down here and praying about, I believe God will give me wisdom and maybe bring a woman like this into my life.
-(NEW) As faithfully as possible, be involved in a small group.  I started going to one on Tuesday mornings and I am amazed at the ladies assembled there.  I really appreciate the diversity and the women who come together to pray.  

Personal 
(REPEAT ALL OF THESE!! - we did pretty well at the last one, but there's always room for improvement!)
-Step it up in the homemaking department.  (Said the woman sitting on her couch w/2 torn out pages of a magazine, a binder, a highlighter, the remote, a banana peel, some laundry and a pile of kleenexes!)  This one is super broad so I need to break it down into smaller pieces...
     -Make more hot breakfasts.
     -Get better at meal planning and prepping things ahead.  (2013 was better...barely...)
     -Buy less cans, packaged foods and aim for more things from scratch.
     -Sew - do you think I can do 6 projects in 2014?
     -Declutter in general.
     -Declutter/minimize clothing stash.  (This is still so hard for me!!)
-READ.  Again.  I miss reading books!  (Doing better b/c I've found some 'old friends' to re-read and actually found some time to read them.)
-Get involved w/the Intergenerational Center.  
-Make it more of a habit to have Sundays be outdoors - hiking, playing kickball, going for bike rides...just keeping at least one day a week for family oriented stuff.  Not family oriented in the way that it's just us, but I mean that we're doing things as a family, maybe w/other families, outside.
There are others from last year's list that I just don't feel are as big of a deal for me this year...


Physical
(REPEAT ALL)
-DRINK WATER!!!  
-Get sleep - 7-8 hrs each night.  I know everything else in life goes sooooo much better when I do!  
-Run a 5K in less than 30 minutes.  
-Thin the thighs.  Ugh.  I've recently seen my weight go up by give or take 10 lbs.  No one else probably can tell, but I can.  Those 10 lbs are in all the wrong places and quite honestly cause physical discomfort at times.  Just being real people.  I'm not even going to get into the psycological/emotional disgust for those 10 lbs.  So - the goal is to kick them and a few other to the curb!!


Family/Household
(REPEAT ALL)
-Adoption.  Step one already done!  At this point our license has been switched from the county to the state and our 'study' has been tossed in to the pool of those waiting for a match. 
-Memorize Bible verses together.
-Out West trip.  
-As always, we're are moving in the direction of less waste, less plastic, less consumption of unnecessary goods, real foods, less chemicals, more garden boxes, more chickens, etc...just keep moving in that direction.
-Move? out of the city.  This is a long shot again this year, but it's still a goal and we can be taking steps toward it every now and then.
-(NEW) Better record keeping.  I am so not organized but I do have a few binders and such...getting better every day at finding systems that work for me.

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Perfection

Do you remember that game?  It was recently 'unearthed' from a closet and the kids are loving it.  I personally never liked it much - you work so hard to put all those pieces in the correct spaces before it pops up and they get all mixed up anyway!  Not to mention how some of them are really similar.  The little kids call the game 'shapes' and are so very proud of themselves when they get them all put in (it's not running...).  That's the version I like =)  Low stress, just put them in on your own time.  Lately I've been seeing that game like a metaphor for life!  There's a lot going on here and we work hard to fit the pieces in just at the right time...
First things first - lots of prayer requests!  Please pray for our family, as our home study file was submitted for a possible adoption (foster-to-adopt).  They (the state or the county of origin) will call and let us know if we have been selected as a match.  More on that later when I am able to share details, but of course you know I will be quick to announce any updates =)  Also, please pray for Dave's mom.  She's been struggling w/a lot of migraines and they found what they believe to be a benign tumor.  If you would like, she has a caring bridge page where you could read more about it (let me know and I can get you the link).  This weekend she will receive IV treatment for the migraines.  Pray for her physical comfort, peace about the situation and that healing will come quickly!  Finally, please pray for the theater group...we are going to be filming the play and turning it into a movie!  It will eventually be sold on amazon, but we will be raising funds to pay actors, the directors and filming costs before September.  If you would like to be a part of the production of this movie in any way, please see our website (http://leastoftheseplayers.wordpress.com) or FB page!  We have seen the Lord's hand at work in all of this and we cannot wait to see what is to come!  We would appreciate your prayers, your encouragement and of course, if you are able, your financial support.  We are in the process of setting up a way for people to donate online, so I will let you know when that is up and running.
Things you can join us in praising the Lord about - recently Colleen was at the children's hospital and her BMI was AVERAGE!!!!  That is a huge deal here at our house!!!  The doctor and nutritionist told us we can 'back off' - no need to stress about calories and how much Colleen is eating.  (Easier said than done, especially when you've been doing it for years!)  It's pretty exciting to think that Colleen has reached her goal, now to work on maintaining it =)  Please praise God w/us that so far no one has gotten super sick or anything.  It's been a pretty good season so far of relative health.  Also that we are all enjoying our various activities - Moses' latest floor routine in gymnastics was much improved - he almost has cartwheels down!  And by down, I mean feet up!  The last couple of meets he struggled to turn his long self over like that...but he's getting a lot better!  At conferences, the teachers all had such good things to say about our kids.  The reading teacher showed me Colleen's writing journal.  I held back the tears as I saw the first few pages of chicken scratches compared to the most recent page.  There was at least one whole sentence...it was readable, there were spaces between the words, it was in a straight line and I know it took a lot of focus and determination for her to do that!  My sweet girl is starting to read on her own and impress me w/her fortitude and stamina to do more in school than I thought possible for this year.
I have been meaning to write a bunch but it has been so busy lately!  AND COLD.  Many days of below zero and wind chills waaaay below zero.  We sort of go into survival mode on those days - check chickens more often, kids might not have school, check pipes and find indoor activities to keep us from getting cabin fever =)  Thankfully lately it's just been snowing a bunch and not too cold.  I started babysitting a friend's little girl 2 days a week - it's so much fun having a little one in the house again!  She found some of our favorite books and I was reminded how special some of those foundational things are to kids.  I started going to a small group of women, the women's ministry is busy serving and getting ready for our conference, play practice is in full swing since we have 5 shows over the last week in March/first week in April.  And then there's the movie!!  Busy busy...Moses just finished his 3rd gymnastics meet and both kids started practices for the kids' spring musical.  Dave is playing music for church again and starting a small group too.  He's been taking on a few more responsibilities at work and we're helping w/the kids' musical at church too.  We know that if we are able to add to our family, we may need to slow down a bit at first, but most of the people we are working w/already know that =)  We are very blessed to have friends and people we consider family here that are so supportive!  Best of all, we know they are praying for us!  I'm doing my best to 'lean in' and let God lead.  So many times, big stuff like this starts happening around here and my brain takes off - I think through all sorts of scenarios, good and bad, riding emotional waves as I think about each one. It's good for me to be busy, to keep my mind centered on what is important and keep my thoughts in the present.  I am very grateful to be a part of the small group and the group of people in our theater company.  I praise God every day for Dave and all the ways he helps me, not to mention keeps me on task =)  It's helpful for me to write here too - like therapy! - and to know that people who read here are praying too, so thank you!!