We are due for a foster care/adoption update! If you recall, after our last foster placement we decided to go straight to adoption. We'd really like to focus on permanently growing our family for a season. A bunch of time has gone by since we made that decision (2 years?!) and the first adoption nibble was around last Thanksgiving. I have mentioned it in an earlier post, but just to recap - the little guy that was 'presented' to us at the time became unavailable for adoption. Fast forward 6 months and for reasons vaguely tossed our way, he became available again. We didn't feel too strongly about adopting him the first time and this time we definitely felt unsettled about it...it's sort of a long story and if you know us in person, feel free to ask. We'll share what we can! Of course, it stinks that us saying 'no' to receiving him as a placement means that he is still in need of one...I hate that a child is waiting - but at the same time, if we are not a good fit for him, it would be in everyone's best interests not to bring him here...are you sensing my mommy guilt? Adoption is such a clump of emotions!! Guarding our hearts but yet trying to leave them open at the same time!! Anyway - fast forward a few weeks and our state social worker called and left a message. It sort of went something like this...
I know you said no to the last placement and I haven't heard much from you (we'd been playing phone tag!) but I wanted to see if you are still interested in adoption. Your license is up for renewal so I was just checking if you'd still like to be in the program...
I nearly dropped the phone! Yes of course we still want to be in the program! You can bet I called her back faster than you can say pizza! When I spoke to her in person, she said that the last time we talked she had profiles of a lot of teen boys but that wasn't the case at the moment...she had some profiles of sibling sets (that's just what I/we wanted to hear!) and she was hoping we would consider looking at them since we were one of the few families she knew of that were able and willing to take multiple children. I made sure not to drop the phone that time and did my best to keep my voice from squeaking! Send me the profiles! All the sibling sets!! I'm ready! She said she'd make sure to get them out today and after that I just stopped listening. Bye, I have to go call my husband and tell him we need to get this place in shape if a bunch of small kids are going to be joining us soon! I smell a trip to the big box store!! Somebody tell me to take a deep breath - even in telling/writing this story I get a little over dramatic and excited =) Of course, I reminded myself that just b/c we would see the profiles, it didn't necessarily mean we would be picked as a match or that we would even say yes to be 'in the running' for the kids anyway. Step one: Read the profiles. Step two: Tell the social worker if you want to be considered. Step three: Wait to see if they choose you....
Well, that timeline is all fine and dandy if there are no other outside influences or variables...!! I incessantly checked my email every 10 minutes, no lie. Nothing came. It was a Weds. Went to bed. Woke up checking my email at 6am like the social worker was burning the midnight oil to send that email to me. (All the foster/adoptive parents can stop laughing now!) Thurs came and went. Fri came and went. Tossed and turned at night, went from mentally preparing to trying desperately not to think about it...God's plan is best. So is His timing even if I am still learning that lesson! Monday I got a little worried. We were still finishing up the re-licensing stuff and needed a few things from the SW. Dave called and asked (as politely as possible) if she had been on vacation or something...she was out of the office for a few days! PHEW - I thought it was some sort of test! Anyway - I'm not sure if I would have passed or not...Tues we got 2 emails!!! After talking and praying about it, we decided to say yes to one of the sibling sets on Weds. And began to wait...One week later and we got notice that the case workers for the kids wants to meet with us!! They will 'present' the case file to us! It basically means we can ask a bunch of questions and hopefully get lots more info...
this is super exciting and awesome and nerve-wracking and special and emotional and all of that and more!! But in the adoption world? It doesn't mean much. We are one teeny tiny baby step closer to having more kids in the house...it's still a long way to an actual adoption. We know that, we get that, we've done the dance, been there, seen the sights, got the T-shirt, sent our moms a postcard...I wouldn't say we are super experienced at this but we do know a few things. The 'step one step two' list up there? I re-wrote it. It should look a little bit more like this..
Step one: Pray
Step two: Ask everyone you know to pray.
Step three: Pray some more.
Step four: Pray as you clean your house!
Step five: Begin thinking about what you may (or may not) need if more people start living in your house...basically re-evaluate the space and stuff you have.
Step six: Wait. You can pray while you are doing Step 5 too =)
So now you are one of the awesome people who are privy to this information and you are wondering what you should do about it? Yes - if you said PRAY, you are correct!! What can you pray for? First and foremost, pray for the 3 kids. There is a reason they are in foster care, waiting to be adopted. Pray for their emotions and how they will handle a possible move. Pray for their protection and well-being, pray for their hearts, pray for their family - I don't begin to think I know what is happening there. Please pray for us as we mentally, emotionally and physically prepare for something that may or may not happen. Pray for unity and the bonds that are existing here, for the bonds that may or may not be formed in the future. I'm sure there are a ton of other ways you can think of as you pray for us! We are grateful that many of you have already been praying for us!! Thank you - of course we look forward to updating everyone as we can...please keep in mind that many of the details are not able to be shared yet- in time, we pray that if it is God's will, we will be able to share much more =)
(By the time I hit publish on this, we have a Tues June 23 appt w/case workers and the state permanency worker...baby steps...)